Last night I when out to a small neighborhood club with a friend to hear her sing. I do not go out like this much anymore, but my friend came from out of town to visit so we went out. This morning I woke up with a fear and discouragement because I saw that every person there was asleep in the program. I mean I have seen this before, but somehow today it stuck me hard and scared me. I was the only one not drinking and there were military boys there who had seen and experienced horrible things while deployed to Iraq and other places. One boy bought 8 shots of whiskey, one for each of his friends that died while deployed and wanted all of use to drink one shot for each of his friends, that night was the anniversary day that they died. I pretended to drink mine, so someone else drank it.
Then to my surprise a friend that came to see my friend sing started to talk to me about what happened to him when in Iraq, he was shaking and getting stuck in his speech as he was coming up to the part of the story that changed his life forever. He started to cry as he was telling me; I just tried to gently encourage him to continue to share with me what happened, so he could tell his story. It was just me and him. Today my heart is breaking, as I saw this poor boy scared for life in his mind of what he had witnessed while there.
I saw his eyes even before I even heard his story, they were in a far off place as it looked like he was staring at the walls, he could not look others in the face for long and had a constant twitching of his legs, as now I see he was in his imagination of the events he had witness, like trying to make sense of them, and an emptiness that haunts me when I think about his eyes. And I think my god, I see this all the time on short clips in the news or more in depth in documentaries, of the slaughter that happens in wars. It is just pictures I see.
This person who talked to me was real in my presents, telling me what goes on in wars, and I see how so many young boys are scared for life. I think he actually saw how he accepted and allowed himself to be manipulated by the military, and I think he was ashamed and did not know how to deal with that. He mentioned he went into the military to help his brother, because they tell the soldiers that are sent home for a break, that if you can not recruit someone in a certain time frame that you will have to go back to Iraq and not get your full time off. So he thought he would pretend to want to join the military to help his brother get more time, but he ended up signing the papers to join the military.
This was hard to listen too, what our military does to people, with no support or carrying at all about life. And how helpless these young people must feel because there is no where to turn, to tell their story, none of it is supported and meant not to be told. And it makes people very uncomfortable to listen to this kind of suffering, so I can imagine that these boys might feel alone in the world. Imagine if they put true stories like this everyday on the news instead of bullshit entertainment. As I am writing this my heart feels broken as I cry with him, as I feel and experience the frustration of what we have accepted and allowed our existence to turn into.
The heartbreak was like a quantum vision I had when hearing his story, not just his story, but I saw and felt, the millions if not billions of people who suffer witness to these horrifying slaughters of human life in the name of war.
The fear that I felt was an inner feeling of the extensiveness of the programming, because I saw every person in the club being the program, exposing my own program, everyone accepting and allowing and trying to find a way in theirs minds to... accept and allow war. Like sorry brother, you had to experience that, lets have a drink.
The frustration was how can I help? The frustration that why can we not just say I will not kill for you anymore. The frustration that those words are so clear and simple - but we do not say it.
I imagine this boy’s life and billions of others who have witnessed the insanity of war, and I realize how they must dread waking up in the morning, only to everyday relive the absolute unimaginable images of great suffering and heartache that they will continually live with.
Maybe we need to first Imagined how much suffering really is going on in the world instead to suppressed and hide it, and then we can start to change this existence to one that is best for all. But I know how we think – we have no time to worry about others, I have to take care of myself and family and hope that does not happen to us.
I don’t know if all soldiers will admit they feel like this, you know it is taught that is weak in a Man and true “solider,” but if you look in their eyes you can see they are hiding and suppressing how they feel or covering it up with justifications that we get and accept from propaganda telling us that our war is honorable.
I think if we imagined these things happening to us – we could wake up and start to support changing the system to one that supports All of Life.
"because war is no longer necessary to keep capitalism going" See rest of quote belowJoin Desteni the system busters, Get your WAKE UP CALL – get involved – The world will not change unless we change it Together. None are free until All are free.
"Furthermore within a system of Basic Income Guaranteed, the products created must be within the context of preserving resources in the World and therefore it must be engineered to last as long as possible, because the added value to a product which is the basis of creating a sustainable economic system, is the labor point and that one equates mathematically; and by having all the information available about everyone and having what is available in the world within the planned model, one can plan exactly what needs to happen with every product, moving in the system to ensure that in the end, every person on Earth has got an effective Basic Income Guaranteed and those that want to earn more can do so and become wealthy, if they want to. This way capitalism survives, ingenuity becomes beneficial and the deception and illusion that is created through public relations and the public lie of obsolescence disappears and the world resources become sustainable, the use of energy becomes sustainable, the economy becomes sustainable and peace and harmony becomes sustainable because war is no longer necessary to keep capitalism going." Bernard Poolman